In my dire attempts to get a vaccine appointment, I checked the sites every day looking for an opening. I got on a wait list at Wayne’s who said they would text my phone when appointments were available and I told them they might better call me instead, but texting was the only option. From there on in I kept my phone on the kitchen table. You’d think I was awaiting a kidney.

I didn’t hold out much hope for getting this text because a friend of mine had been on the same list for “quite some time already.” I went to Kinney’s and asked if they could help me. I was given a little piece of paper with several options listed. I signed up for the text alert, and I signed up for the email alert and was told to check the website on Wednesdays because that had typically been the day it had been arriving. I had also acquired several phone numbers of organizations who could help me should I have a problem.

So now I was locked and loaded, determined to not get passed by when the next batch came through. As I was heading to bed one night, I stopped to check my email. There was one from my minister. Curious, I opened it. Shazam! It was a heads up for a vaccine sign-up at the hospital just five days away and there were only 52 spots left. I knew from other people’s experiences that if I so much as stopped to blow my nose those spots could fill up so I typed like my pants were on fire. Now here’s something you don’t know — I took typing in high school and as long as I got the electric typewriter I was pretty fast. But there’s not much use for honing this skill while slinging burgers, changing diapers, or making prom dresses so I am now just a mediocre hunt and pecker.

Once I secured my spot I forwarded this to my friend (above) and luckily she is a night owl and did it right away, because by morning all the spots were filled. We arranged to go together. 

I did it! I felt like I had grabbed the brass ring, won the lottery, side-stepped doggie doo-doo …

In retrospect I can’t believe I was so dang excited. As I sat in the “let’s see if you have a bad reaction” room, it hit me. I had just let them inject stuff that simulates having had the virus. I pictured a million tiny white blobs with the red dots floating through my body. Racing towards — well, I don’t know what but I could feel my system answering the call to duty by going into attack mode. I suddenly felt weary, with a dose of anxiety on the side, and hoping the nurse would notice something wrong with me before I exploded into a million pieces. I also hoped this feeling passed before my friend was ready to leave because I was the driver.

 And holy cow, my arm hurt. Not at first, but I kept massaging it —thinking it to be the magic trick no one else tried before. I think it made things worse. I exercised it by playing cards the old fashioned way, and still I felt like I’d been punched by the Hulk himself. For three days.

Naturally I’m looking less forward to the second dose, which is rougher on the system. I have plans for it though. I’m canceling everything that week and planning to hole up on the couch to watch movies. And I’m planning to get drunk. Just kidding. I need to stay hydrated. I will be lining up eight bottles of water on the table to nag me. Aspirin will be involved. If I can get through childbirth three times, I can power through this.

Some irony here is that after I got my first dose, I finally got that text alert. But they wanted me to text back a Y or N if I still wanted an appointment or not. I have a flip phone with just the numbers. I used to know how to text that way but not anymore. Still, I tried. No matter how hard or how fast I hit the six I could only get an O. If I pushed it twice I got ON. I decided to go with that, I mean it is technically NO backwards so let them figure it out.

Then my computer nearly blew up with emails from every source announcing appointment openings everywhere. Oh sure, now they find me. 

Here’s hoping that everyone who wants a vaccine finally gets one!

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