I have often wondered what the attraction to yoga classes is all about. I knew it was supposed to relax you by slowing down your pace and clearing your mind. I knew it was good for your heart. I also knew it was not for me.

Why? The list is long. I could start with the skimpy little outfits that look tight but somehow don’t split open when you attempt the downward dog. You won’t catch me wearing any. That does not mean I’ll be naked, it means I would be wearing my pajamas. 

I also can’t sit on my tailbone so some of those poses look downright painful, and I figure if you can’t contort yourself into various letters of the alphabet you might as well stay home.

My biggest issue with yoga is the slow pace. Those who know me know I want everything yesterday so yoga — for me — would be akin to being stuck in traffic — and that, my friends, is a true test of my character. 

Slow down? I don’t want to. I was born to be busy — in fact I came out of the womb three weeks early because I needed to get this show on the road! 

Clear my head? I do it all day long. God and I have this amazing relationship where I talk and talk and talk while He listens — and He never hits the mute button.  

Now there is Hot Yoga — because regular yoga isn’t aggravating enough? Heat is my kryptonite and I wouldn’t last five minutes before melting into the cracks in the floorboards. So on every level yoga is not for me.

I recently read an article on Mindful Meditation, which is sort of like yoga — minus the mantras, the outfits, the humiliation of being seen in one of those outfits, and possible heat.

You do this in your own home, in a comfortable chair, with eyes opened or closed — your choice. The point is to sit still for five to10 minutes and just focus on your breathing. “In – out – in –out” and try not to think about the load of laundry in the dryer that’s getting more wrinkled by the minute, or that you forgot to thaw anything for dinner and its already 4:00. 

And you will think these kinds of things. Your mind will wander. The key is to realize you are wandering and reel your mind back in. Supposedly it gets easier to stick with the concentration after time. 

This intrigues me because each night when I climb into bed exhausted and begin thanking God for a good day and a wonderful bed, and even give Him kudos for the concept of sleep rejuvenation — something causes my mind to wander and any further planned thoughts go every which way except to a finished sentence. The next thing I know its morning.  

I think that is the exact reason why I should try this technique. Surely I can sit still for 5 minutes. 

I started off great: “In – out – in – out – in – out - is it Friday? I need to clean the bathroom …”

I’ll let you know if it gets better.


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